I usually make resolutions, and I usually don't accomplish them. Well, I can't say that I have ever accomplished a resolution in my life. But just this morning, I read a blog post by a writing agent who has the notion this year that she will just make a list of the way she wants to feel this year and use that as her guide instead of making specific empty goals. Because that's usually what our goals center around anyway, isn't it? The way we want to feel.
So.... how do I want to feel?
The first word that comes to mind is light. I want to feel weightless. I want to defy gravity. I don't want the weight of the world around me to affect me on the inside. None of it. Not stress about money, bills, kids. Not the way other people think or feel about me. Not the size of my jeans. I want to be motivated by my insides, my soul, by the depth of my love for my family and my Lord, and by the plan that my Lord has for me. I want to soar above the earthliness on wings of an eagle.
"... but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." Isaiah 40: 31
I also want to feel love, loved, full of love. Not love as in, "Oh, I love Hershey's kisses!" But love as in 1 Corinthians 13. Real love. For my husband, for my kids, for the lady who rings up my groceries at Publix. Love through Christ for all who cross my path. Love to the fullest and without limits. I want to accept and feel the love God beams down upon my soul, and I want to reciprocate it to those around me.
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres." 1 Corinthians 13: 4 - 7
Maybe I could combine those two words and blend the thoughts into one word... freedom. Freedom in Christ. That's how I really want to feel. Free in God's love and mercy. Released from the past and living in the today. Free from resolutions. Free from the world.
So here's to a new year. Here's to feeling light and loved and free from all the crap of the world that threatens to swallow us up. Here's to stepping into a new year full of hope and promise. And not just for me, but for all who read these words.