Thursday, August 5, 2010

Do you ever have those nights that are so full of dreams that it seems you didn't get a single second of sleep???? I've had several of those lately, but last night was the worst. As if the minute I close my eyes this world awakens and keeps my brain from resting.

Last night, my dream began with me heading to a therapy session. Anyone who has ever been to therapy knows it's quite a draining experience in and of itself. I mean, you think you want to think and talk about yourself without interruption or feelings of guilt until you actually do it for a whole hour. And then you just need a break - from yourself. So I get to this place, and I am waiting in the waiting room which is full of people. As I am waiting, I discover that there are serial killers and other awful criminals around me waiting too. Then my husband shows up to join my session unexpectedly and has to fill out all kinds of paper work. Then something else happens (fuzzy part of the dream) and I end up roaming the streets of this town for what seemed like the duration of my sleep cycle.

At some point in the dream, some sort of evil force is trying to take over the town. My kids show up adding another element for me to fret over while I should be sawing logs (not literally, mind you, but figuratively). People are everywhere - walking through the streets and trying to get away from something. I end up on the interstate with my kids - walking, of course. There were no cars around at all, but rather masses of people walking. Somehow I end up in some building with all these stairs, and I am climbing and climbing these flights of stairs with both my kids, trying to keep the three of us together.

Gosh... I am exhausted recounting it here.

I don't know what the heck dreams mean or if they mean anything at all. Sometimes I like to think that dreams are a message from your subconscious to your conscious self. Sometimes I would like to think that it's a way for you spirit to speak to your earthly self. On mornings like these after such a weird crazy dream, I'd like to think they don't mean anything at all. Because if they do mean something, it must mean that I'm a crazy mess...

I have been dreaming more wildly and vividly since I've been writing more. And I guess that makes sense -I am opening up a part of my brain that has been relatively closed for quite some time. But it sure would be nice if I could close the door to that world when I lay down at night so I could get a little quality rest. Just sayin'.

1 comment:

carrie said...

I need a nap now!