Tuesday, October 23, 2007

What A Day

I know that we need rain desperately, but couldn't we work out a deal where we could spread it out over four or five days instead of fitting it into just one day? I can barely keep my eyes open today. Last night the storms hit around 1:00 am. The sound of the wind and rain woke Madalyn up, and her daddy got up and got her and she cuddled in next to him for the rest of the evening. It rained so hard and the wind was blowing so that I thought the house would fall down. It kept me awake for thirty or forty minutes. When I asked David if he heard the storm this morning, he said, "What storm?" They couldn't be any more opposites if I had drawn the plans myself. But I am grateful for the rain. Now at least everything will be fresh - it has gotten so dusty and dry. I am hoping it might help David too. I still can't decide what the source of the cough is exactly, but I haven't heard any wheezing for now.

Now, as promised, my jalapeno story. I have to start off by explaining that I have a huge appetite. I do not miss a meal - or a snack, for that matter. That's just the way I am. I eat. A lot. Most people, these days, do not, however. So usually when we go on a trip of any distance, I take along snacks for the road so that others who don't get hungry don't have to stop on account of me. Well Saturday, I forgot to bring along my snacks and somehow managed to only partake in one meal the whole day. By the time we arrived in Baton Rouge, I was beyond hungry. But we were meeting up with some friends of our friends who had a ton of food already prepared. So we changed and joined the tailgating action. But I didn't really get that much to eat. They had a bunch of things I just wasn't all the sure about. At the game, I ate a hot dog, and while at the condiment area noticed the biggest jar of jalapenos I had ever seen. I love jalapenos. So round about the third quarter, those bad boys started calling my name. Scott got me a thing of nachos, and I went over to that jar and added, I kid you not, probably eighty jalapenos on top of the nachos. And then I commenced to eat every single jalapeno and nacho chip. I have never tasted anything as good! I was starving. At first I was fine, but within thirty minutes, my face started to sweat. Not pouring down like I had been running, just beading up all over from an internal furnace. Then I started to feel a little funny. It was a feeling I can't quite explain, one that I had never felt before. And then I started to freak out inside. I knew I was going to puke, and I hate to puke. I'll do anything not to puke. And there I am, shoulder to shoulder with all these people, no easy way to get out. I made it to the bathroom once but didn't vomit. I got myself a paper towel and wet it and was able to talk myself out of the hurl. But towards the end of the game it came over me again, and as the last second ticked off the clock, I made a beeline to the bathroom and could not avoid it any longer. I had eaten a hot dog and all those nachos and I seriously dreaded what was about to take place. I made it to the stall and leaned over the toilet and opened the mouth anticipating an eruption of epic proportions. And all that came out was some clear liquid. Pure acid, I swear. It burned so bad. And I was squatting there (cause I was trying not to touch anything except the wall beside me) waiting and waiting for all the contents of my stomach to come spilling out. But it never did. And then I was okay. The one thing that kept running through my mind during all this was watching a jalapeno eating contest in high school and I remember thinking how stupid you would have to be to eat that many jalapenos at one time. Hmmm. At least I ate mine with nachos.

3 comments:

Erika said...

Oh honey, yuck! ha ha Funny, I was not a jalepeno fan until about a month ago. I actually had some on my sub today and relished the internal burn. It has to be eating some of those calories, no?

carrie said...

I got sick at the thought of that many jalepenos. Yuck. Glad you didn't loose everything you ate. The thought of hanging my head over a toilet at the ball field is discusting!

Rebecca said...

The only time I have been able to eat more than a few jalapenos at a time was when I was sick with sinus problems. They actually opened me up and I felt better! Great story!